Potty Everywhere

Joshua is posing for this.  And Genevra is ready for this hug to end.

My babies will despise me one day for this, but it had to be posted.  Too cute not to.

Spring break for us was found in the great city of Omaha.  The geese park was Joshua's favorite, while I preferred the visitor's center for the LDS temple.

Checking out the Easter egg hunt booty.  He was so preoccupied with the goodies in the one egg, we had a hard time finding others;)

There are several books and articles that cite all of the many signs to indicate that your child is ready to potty train.  About a month ago, Joshua was hitting about 7 of 10 of the signs of readiness.  He knows when he needs to go, wakes up with a dry diaper, is interested, etc., etc.  So we bought a fun little hippo potty that sings and reads a story.  For about the first two weeks, I was excited.  We did a "pee-pee dance", cheered, and doled out stickers like they were going out of style.  Joshua was enamored with the idea of a little seat just for his stuff, and I was looking forward to a bright future of just one diapered bum in the Kirkman household.  #1 was smooth sailing- as long as his lower half was naked.  #2-- not so much (I would find brown surprises left in odd places for me).  There is a very deep rooted fear of bowel movements going on in my little boy's head.  I won't go into the gory details, but today, Joshua had diarrhea.  Need I say more?  Let it be written that today was one of the longest days of my career as a mother.  For anyone who has gone through potty training and all of the misery it entails, I ask that you send me great, warm, virtual hugs of sympathy.  I need them.  Thanks.
On a happier note, the weather is warming up to a balmy 90 degrees.  Last week, we were in the mid-40s.  It was a fast, but very welcome transition.
I hosted book club last month and made the Jewish traditional challah bread in honor of reading "The Chosen" by Chaim Potok.  (Amazing book.)  It was a hit...and made me wish we were Jewish, so I could feel obligated to go to that kind of work for that kind of goodness every Sabbat.  More recently, with the help of some women in the ward, I threw a baby shower for a friend of mine.  The idea of a baby shower was daunting, but with the help of friends, it was a success.  And now I am not so fearful of trying to host something so grown up.
Josh is busy.  He is always busy.  For anyone who has done grad school, you know that 18 credit hours (this includes a studio!), is suicidal.  His professors have said as much.  All I can say is that this semester has been rough.  There are times when I wonder why we are doing this to ourselves and how on earth we are going to make it through this week, let alone 2 more years.  The thought that fuels both Josh and I is that we felt SO right about our decision to do this in the first place.  Josh frequently reminds me that President Uchtdorf has said, "Doubt your doubts, before you doubt your faith."  I have faith that the Lord would not ask such hard things of us only to let us fall on our faces.
Genevra is fat.  And beautiful.  She is my bright, happy little ray of sunshine.  When I lay her on the floor, she rolls from one end of the room to another and then back again, and big smile on her face.  I couldn't have asked for a sweeter bit of heaven than what we have been blessed with in her.    

Utah and the Ex-Utahans

Daddy helping Joshua open birthday presents.  Joshua is sporting his Hungarian hat that Auntie Joy brought back from her mission.

Joshua and Kyle Gardner (cousin) at the bonfire.  Would you believe Joshua is 7 months older than Kyle?!  He is a shrimp, but a cute one.

Bonfire!!!

Great-Grandpa Ed's work horses.  Don't quote me on this, but I think they are Perchin.

Genevra with her first Teddy.  Can't get enough of her fat face;)

Grandpa John with Genevra at Joshua's birthday party.

Grandpa DeGraffenried taking Joshua for a horse ride.

Not the greatest of pictures, but I love it.  Daddy and Joshua at the pool, playing basketball.

These are my treasures.  And they seem to love each other, even though Genevra looks a bit skeptical about the situation.

University of Kansas was kind to us (and everyone else) this year, and gave us a 5 week break in between fall and spring semesters, which was more than a little deserved.  Our travel log follows this brief side note:  I won't throw the pity party I want to, whining about how this semester, I felt like divorced marriage with visitation rights.  Josh would pop in on the weekends to play dad and husband for Saturday morning and all Sunday, and then it was back to the grindstone.  It goes without saying that we are thrilled to have a summer and fall semester down!
Around 4 p.m., right after Josh's last final, we made our exodus back to Zion (Utah).  Although the longer I live away from Utah, the more both Josh and I agree that Zion is not a place, but more a state of being.  Anyway, we were making great time until about soon after Denver.  From there, it was downhill.  We ended up having to pull over around 4 a.m. for Josh to catch a few Zs, hoping all the while that the snowplows would make an appearance.  We didn't make it to one of my best friend and cousin, Pam DeGraffenried's, wedding in the Salt Lake City Temple.  BUT I will never forget the surge of gratitude for our safety and such an amazing friend when she walked through the temple doors and I was there to give her a hug;).
Our visit home was very eventful and grand.  We paraded around with our two screaming (for lack of sleep) babies, gracing everyone with our presence.  The Tippetts Christmas party was nice with good food and great people.  Josh's aunt Sharron and her hubby were able to visit Josh's parents from California while we were there, and as well as his sister, Julie and her friend.  After 2 long years of working on the Fort Lauterdale, FL temple on a mission, my DeGraffenried Grandparents came home.  Grandpa gave all of his grandkids a hay ride out to Blackrock in Kanosh, where we warmed up to a bonfire.  We spent New Year's Eve with Pammy and her new husband, Daniel.  Josh and I caught up on a semester's worth of missed dates, soaking in the plethora of free sitters.  My family went horseback riding in the mountains with Josh and Joshua, and then headed to Gunnison for swimming.  (You'd think it was summer with all the sporting events, but it was actually pretty dang cold).  We watched my brother Eddy wrestle in Juab, not to mention spending many a great day with Grandma and Grandpa Kirkman on the 4-wheeler and eating junk food.
Joshua turned TWO on January 5th!  We had a party for him at my parent's, and I really think the highlight of it for him was ripping off the wrapping paper.  I can't believe my baby boy is a full-blown toddler, complete with catch phrases like, "NO!" and "Why?"  One of Josh's favorite things to say is, "If that boy weren't so cute, I would paddle his butt."  I doubt he really would do any butt paddling, but I concur.  Joshua is my little man and my favorite mess maker (Genevra isn't making messes yet and Josh is a neat freak).  He lights up my world in a way that only he can.  I read somewhere once that the Lord sends certain spirits to certain parents for a reason.  They are the parents who can raise and handle those children in a special way that no one else could.  I am a firm believer in this principle.
While we were home, Genevra was nick-named "Tender".  My sister insists that it is her fluffy, fat rolls that somehow link her to this name; although my mom thinks of pink meat and I think of a weepy old lady when we hear this.  Either way, she has the sure foundation of a Wal-Mart Super Center supporting a chicken coop.  AKA- She is rolly polly fat on her bottom and thighs without nearly as much chub up top.
We had a blast at home, surrounded by tons of family and friends.  But it's SO good to be back, living our own lives and sleeping in our own beds.
P.S.  Josh got a portable DVD system for Christmas, making the drive home a breeze.  Not including from Grand Junction to Denver--that seems to be our Achilles Heel on our drives to and from Utah.              

And then there were four!

This smile makes up for his bad moments.

From our back yard!

Couldn't quite capture the full-fledged smile, but this came close.

WOW! "Wow" is the only word that really encompasses our lives for the past two months. Here at home, I have been trying to keep my head above water with two babies. Joshua is going to be two in January, but until he is potty trained and feeding himself (without me living in fear that there will be food all over the walls), he is still a baby. Joshua has started waking up increasingly early. Yesterday he woke at 4:30 a.m. for the day. The only way Josh and I were aware of his being awake was that he was getting frustrated at the T.V. for not turning on. Then, as new babies do, Genevra likes to play from about 11 to 1. Needless to say, I am bushed. Tired. Exhausted. Zombified. You get the picture.

BUT on the other hand, I can honestly say I have not been happier. Genevra has brightened our home in countless ways. She is very smiley and loves to coo and interact with Josh and I. We are thrilled Joshua wants to play with her...as long as it does not involve him dragging her out of her swing or force feeding her animal crackers. Genevra (or as Joshua calls her "Ivy" for Ivory) is my perfect baby. At nearly 13 lbs. (at only 8 weeks old) she is butterball round and nurses like the apocalypse is nearing.

When Josh started the architecture program at KU, he was warned by almost everyone he talked to that he would be living at school. We both assumed they were exagerating. They weren't. From roughly 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. Josh is at school in classes and doing his personal homework. He comes hom from 5:30 to 8ish and does dinner/scripture study/bedtime routine with us and then goes back to school until the wee hours of the morning doing group projects. When I get a minute to myself (literally, A minute), I find myself missing this guy something awful. He is such a hard worker and is truly my hero. Both of us are working hard to keep a clear perspective and believe this refiners fire will be worth it.

Our evenings and weekends hold some good times though. A couple of weeks ago, one of my best buds, Pam, came to visit with her fiance over their fall break. We hunted for the perfect pumpkin at Schakes, toured Mass St, went on dates, stopped by multiple church history sites, and had a pretty good time. I loved to have her here to share in my new load.

We are a blessed little clan. I feel like my C-section is healing well, and there are few pictures that seem to lift my spirits quite like seeing the amazing fall colors Lawrence has to offer. In Southern Utah we had to drive into the mountains to find trees-- and then most of the trees were pine/juniper. But here, I only have to look out the window to see reds and oranges.

Pictures are of Josh and Joshua at the tri-ward trunk-or-treat. Joshua went as a monster who refused to wear the super cute head wrap thing, while Genevra was a fuzzy, pink bunny. Josh was a cowboy and I was...sleepy:)

We Invite You

This is our favorite time to watch television! We invite you to tune in on your T.V., the lds.org, or the radio to listen to these inspired messages.

Kirkman Clan: Genevra Ivory

Kirkman Clan: Genevra Ivory: On August 29th around 11:00 p.m., we were so very blessed to welcome our little girl, Genevra Ivory, into the world. She was 8 pounds, 1...

Genevra Ivory

On August 29th around 11:00 p.m., we were so very blessed to welcome our little girl, Genevra Ivory, into the world. She was 8 pounds, 13 ounces and 19 1/2 inches long. The journey to get her here was not quite what we had planned or expected, but what birth is?

Joshua was born C-section due to his being classified as "macrosomic" (or too large to be allowed to deliver vaginally) at 41 weeks. When I look back at his birth, I realize that even though I was angry about not being given a chance to labor, I think the possibility of shoulder dystocia due to his size (10 lbs) was far too great and the doctors helped me make an informed decision.

But I was fiercely determined to have a VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean) for our next baby. I worked very hard and gained much less with this pregnancy and read every bit of literature I could on how to have a successful VBAC. I prayed for it in every prayer. Josh prayed that I would get my wish. Then at 38 weeks we had the ultrasound that would determine our fate. Baby girl came in at 9 lbs. I was devastated, as my hopes for a VBAC waned, but my midwife, Sarah Darby said that we would wait it out and see what would happen before 41 weeks came around. We went to the zoo in Topeka, on shopping excursions, to Clinton Lake, and did just about anything to keep our minds off of the "what ifs".

Then, at 5:30 a.m. on the 29th, my water broke. I doubt that anyone has ever been so excited to have their water break. I almost cried tears of joy. Serious. We had a wonderful woman from our ward come over and watch Joshua and Sarah (my youngest sister) and went to the hospital. The ride to the hospital was almost comical. I was chattering away, thrilled to my toes that at any moment I would begin to have the contractions everyone talked about (but I had never felt), while Josh was scared to death that I was dying-- due to all of the blood I was loosing. Looking back, the funniest thing was when Josh wheeled me into the labor area and started stuttering something incoherent about "labor" and "water" and I assured the nurses that I was fine and just needed to be checked in.

For five of the longest minutes, the nurses tried to get a steady heartbeat from the baby, but had no success. Before I had a chance to register that something was wrong, two of the doctors came in and said that we would get me into the O.R. to do a C-section as soon as possible. I burst into tears...totally embarrassed to be crying in front of three nurses and two doctors. Dr. Stone said she would try one more time to see if they could get a steady beat. And we did.

I spent the next 15 hours laboring. When I was checked only two days before, I was at a 3 and very thin. Somehow, my body defied physics and when we checked in at the hospital, I was not dilated at all. Zilch. Needless to say, it was a very long 15 hours with me alternating between using pitocin and having strong contractions that distressed my baby, to not being on pitocin and hardly experiencing any contractions. I could narrate the ups and downs of the labor progression, but that would get tiresome...as it was for me. There came a point around 10:00 that evening where little Genevra was coming down the birth canal, ready to make her grand entrance. But with each contraction, her heart rate would drop and then flat line for an instant. And with each progressive contraction, it took just a little longer for her heart rate to return.

Throughout the pregnancy, I had been given various priesthood blessings from my husband, assuring me that my will was also my Heavenly Father's will. I assumed that this meant that my pursuing a VBAC was right and that it was MEANT to happen for us. When Dr. Stone came into the room and told me that my baby's well being depended on us having a repeat C-section, both Josh and went through a series of mixed emotions. We had both had our hopes set on a VBAC and the possibilities of a faster postpartum recovery, as well as the opportunity to have a larger family that a VBAC could offer. I wanted to prove to myself that I was just as capable at giving birth as the women who deliver vaginally. It was at that moment that I came to realize that more than anything else, and most important was my baby's health-- and that was what the Lord wanted for me too. His will was that my baby was healthy.

Genevra could not have been healthier or more beautiful. After the C-section, the doctor explained that it was a miracle she was healthy. My placenta had stopped working properly and had begun to shrivel...literally. Most babies who have this happen are under five pounds and experience difficulties upon birth, which was happily not the case with Genevra. But, this was the reason behind Genevra not tolerating the stress of labor. We were also informed that my tailbone is exceptionally odd shaped, curving in. Thus the reason behind my lack of progress during labor. The result being that my chances of delivering vaginally and a baby making it past my tailbone are very slim.

The fact of the matter is that we have a bundle of joy sent straight from heaven. The timing of her birth could not have been more perfect. My family was driving back from Tennessee where they picked up my brother from his mission, so on the way home they were able to stop by the hospital and admire their newest grandchild. My mom stayed for four days after they left and saved me from going insane. She catered to Joshua's tantrums at being de-throned, cooked us amazing meals, did our laundry, and helped me cope with the steep drop in my hormones. Yeah, my mom is amazing and I can't say enough how grateful I am for her being there when I needed her most.

Our ward is also something to brag about. Joshua has been more than temperamental of late, throwing fits if I hold little sister or even look at him with my brows slightly furrowed, and upon my mom leaving, I had no idea how I would survive. But several angels from our ward volunteered to watch Joshua during the time Josh was in classes over the course of a few days. On top of this, meals were brought into our home. The service these women gave has made my life so much more easy to swallow with the reality of having two children to take care of. I will be posting pictures as they happen.

For now, life is good. What can I say more?

Where We're At

For one of our playdates with the ward, we went to a Curious George exhibit in Kansas City.  Joshua was thrilled to finally meet his hero in the flesh (sort of).

Joshua and I hanging out in our tiny pool in back of the apartment, trying to escape the super high temperature humidity.

Josh doing his honey-do list during his time off.  Yes, he is painting the kitchen.  And yes, the '70s, exceptionally gross looking cabinets needed it. 

Once upon a time, I was a faithful blogger. That was before I had a toddler whose sole mission in life is to be as destructive as possible in the shortest amount of time. The scary thing is that in a matter of a few short weeks, we will be welcoming a second child into our home...a little girl (!) to be exact;) We are very excited to meet her, even if she is going to be the size of a small whale. At an ultrasound two weeks ago (34 weeks) she was going on 7 pounds and measuring 37 weeks. I won't sugar coat how upset I was when I realized that her size would be a huge determination in whether or not I could have a vaginal birth, rather than another C-section. But when I think about it, faith would not be faith unless the odds were against me somewhat; Josh and I are still hoping and praying that she will come early enough that I won't be attempting to give birth the a 12 pound baby at 41 weeks.

Somewhere around the beginning of this last spring, Josh and I decided on taking our bodies to Lawrence, Kansas for the next three years. Shortly thereafter, my parents did what they do best and stepped in to help us in our time of need. We embarked on our journey on the 27th of May and saw our little apartment for the first time the following day. The cost of living must be significantly different in Utah-- at least concerning apartments. Our apartment in Cedar City was much newer on the inside and nicer, for much cheaper. Both Josh and I feel immensely blessed to live in the ward we do, which almost makes up for the difficulties we have had with our apartment (roof falling in, sinks leaking, toilet breaking in half, neighbors having drunken, loud parties). From the moment we made ourselves known in the ward, we were welcomed and surrounded with people who support each other and help in a way I have not seen in a ward before. It really gives the impression of a ward family when you consider that most of the members out here do not have family living within driving distance.

After much hard work and time spent, Josh completed his first semester at University of Kansas this summer. He was not expecting the program to be so intense and demanding, but I think he will survive if he can pace the workload. Josh is already a legend within the MaRCh program since hardly anyone is married, let alone a father of two children. With how this summer semester was so demanding, we seriously have our doubts about Josh being able to work a job but this has been a benefit for me because this month between the two semesters, Josh has been able to work on improving the state of our living quarters, under my direction.

Joshua is growing way too fast for my taste. Not physically (still only in the 25%) as much as personality intelligence. He is sleeping in a big boy bed, and has learned how to get out and empty his clothes drawers by putting each article of clothing on his body during the time he should be going to bed. Joshua does not say any full sentences yet, but his vocabulary has grown in leaps; most of the time I don't understand what he is saying, but there are usually enough discernible words to and pointing to distinguish what he wants. We are enjoying exploring some of the many, many parks and stores and I especially look forward to the day when it is easier for me to move about at these grand places.

It is so nice to go to the play groups our ward has and get to associate with amazing women who are also fairly young moms. It's safe to say that thus far, we have found nothing not to like about Lawrence. It is a larger city than what either of us are used to, but we are both loving how it has the small town feel with all of the many advantages of a bigger place. The greenery is very delightful, and the weekly (or more) rains are good for cooling off the oven of humidity. We are happy here and hope to make this feel more and more like home.